68 SEPTEMBER 2024 | INTHEVUE.COM supposed to be an example and be who we have taught him to be… humble, confident, disciplined, loving, kind, not lacking self- control. Why was it him?” Immediately, the Lord answered my question, loud and clear. My heart was softened as I heard, “Not your son, My son. I’ll teach him how to tame his frustration. Let Me take care of him. This is his testimony, not yours.” I certainly didn’t think it was supposed to be our son out there on the ball field losing his temper, but God’s son was on the ball field losing his temper, allowing an opportunity for the Lord to teach not only him, but his mom as well, that God gives each of us our own testimony to live and learn from. Our testimony is part of the way He works in us, the way He softens our hearts, the way He draws us near to Him. Through my disappointment, I had failed to remember that my first line of defense should always be to seek the Lord through prayer. I didn’t need to share my heartache with a friend. As I sat quietly and gave the Holy Spirit an opportunity to meet me in the middle of my disappointment, He gave me the greatest reminder. He loves our children more than we do, a love that is so deep we can’t comprehend. He is doing a work in them that we can’t do. We are only capable of getting on our knees daily and praying that their hearts would be softened as He works in them. That they would each see His work in them. That they would recognize when the Lord is in such pursuit of them and pursue Him as well. That they would recognize when the enemy is trying so hard to find a way in. That we would be an example of God’s love and model His love to each of our children. I’m so thankful that I heard the Lord before I reached out to a friend. My heart softened, my ears listened, and my eyes became so full of tears. If you’ve ever struggled to see your child outside of who you have taught them to be, find a quiet place and open your heart to the Lord. He will meet you in the middle of your despair and remind you that He created them. Their salvation and testimony are His to work out in them. We must rest confidently in our obedience to His instruction, training them up in the way they should go and leaving the rest up to Him. RECENTLY, OUR SON FAILED TO exhibit in his actions what he has been taught about self- control and let frustration get the best of him on the ball field. The morning after the ballgame I struggled to not allow disappointment to overwhelm me. My husband and I had a long discussion about our feelings, our love for our child, his passions, and the discipline that we would use to address the loss of control. Following our conversation, I still felt the need to call a girlfriend - another mom, someone that could relate from a mom’s perspective so that I could let out all my feelings of sadness and disappointment. Someone who knows him like we do despite his reactions. That morning, I wanted the world to know that though he had a moment of failure the night before, he’s the one in our house that gives multiple hugs a day. That he is the one that checks on us when he knows something is wrong. That he’s the one that asks us to come pray with him before we can get to his room with him at night. That he’s the gentle giant excelling on the field, who also has so much love despite his frustration. As a parent, truly the list goes on and on. I sat on our front porch watching my husband pull out of the driveway that morning contemplating who to call. After a few minutes, the Holy Spirit reminded me that I didn’t need to talk to a girlfriend to make me feel better, I didn’t need to defend our son and explain what had happened, I just really needed to lean into my daily quiet time on the porch and have a conversation with Him. “Why our son? Why did it have to be our son on the ball field that lost his temper that night? How embarrassing that I had to watch as our son lost his cool and let frustration get the best of him. Our son is supposed to have it together. He is B y K a c e y C l a n a h a n BeekeepersHill His to Tame
